Laddies who Lunch

Must  check calendar, Pancake Tuesday, Ash Wednesday; not April the first.
Gauleiter Pickles emerges from Pickles Towers with another big idea.
The Big Lunch.
Too easy, open goal, Jonny Wilkinson in the pocket 15 metres in front of the posts, a man with his wallet open repeatedly pleading Help yourself! Help yourself! 
Dear god; they just keep him hanging around so they can wheel him out in a handcart when some light relief is needed!
(That was  vicious, unnecessary, sizeist, offensive to the man with a fuller figure and a gratuitous pun the like of which I have not come across in editing nearly six years of this rubbish! ....Ed)